Find Your Why
The act of creating can be seen as this sort of science. Both are built upon this innate desire to shape an understanding of the world around us.
Do you have something you love? Do you have something that you are so interested in that you just want to share it with the world?
Or are you hoping to find that thing? Does it feel like you’re just wading through life without knowing what lights you up?
Lately, I’ve felt between both worlds. What used to light me up is slowly dimming and the potential of what could is giving me hope to move forward.
And when I’m in moments like this, I have to remind myself why I have the desire to create in the first place. What am I drawn to say? Why am I drawn to connect?
And you can create just for the act of creation.
The desire for connection is enough. Or the desire for joy. Or the desire to improve lives. Or any reason.
You just have to fully open yourself up to that why, without shame.
That lit-up feeling is your anchor.
No matter how chaotic or low life may be, that anchor will always come back.
It’s much more simple than we make it seem. I think many of us get in our own heads and feel bad when we don’t have this huge, earth-shattering reason for why we create. We are all stuck in this hero’s tale, where if we aren’t sacrificing and climbing the mountain, then we aren’t doing enough.
When I was a kid, I would feel so much shame if I had an interest in exploring something. I didn’t want to waste my parents time if I wasn’t going to fully pursue it. Whatever I did, felt like I had to enter into a contract that said “this is my life now,” or else I wasn’t meant to explore it.
I’m sure my parents didn’t truly put that kind of pressure on me. As children, we don’t have capacity for nuance yet, so it just takes one remark to make us take on a perspective that is black and white. If I do ___ then I won’t receive love.
So I just wanted to give you the space to find a why that doesn’t need to be argued or debated.
Having the desire to try is enough.
And if that desire disappears, that’s okay too.
Everything is about momentum.
And when we are compelled to create for the sake of creation, then we might uncover a why that we didn’t even know was possible.
If my work is to spread some ideas, then silence to find those ideas is actually useful.
-Mo Gawdat
As you contemplate your why, consider silence.
What would it feel like to have an idea and put it down for a day? Or ten?
Can you trust that the idea will still be there for you to pick back up or evolve to something even more potent than you orginally thought?
My friend sent me this podcast and I think you might enjoy it too.
They talk a lot about being in flow; moving with your intuition instead of trying to hold on to everything.
It’s so easy to attach to objects, routines, people, but I think if we find our why and let that “why” evolve with us, we open ourselves up to more flow.
And it’s so easy right now to be swept up in all that is bad. There is so much pain in the world and it’s all at our fingertips all the time.
You want to do something, you want to help change things. Or you disassociate just to survive. Maybe if you focus on that why; that voice in your head that pushes you a little bit further, you can ground down and remove a bit of the burden off your shoulders.
Sometimes it’s hard to keep creating. It feels like I’m wasting my time. But, is it wasted if the creation makes me happy? Is it wasted if it helps me connect with others and communicate my own understanding of the world?
It’s important to trust we are doing what we can and what we do is enough. It may not feel like enough. On a personal or societal level. But, it is.
You’re enough.
with love,
Talula Rose
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